This week's post is from Ted Shimer of Freedom Fight. Ted contacted me about 10 months ago, after reading Beyond Betrayal, because as someone who designs groups for male addicts, he wanted to make sure he was understanding the wife's side of the story. I really appreciate it when those who work with the men take the time to learn
My Husband's Watching Porn... What do I Do?
Shame on Who? Part 2
Last week, I introduced the "Shame on... who?" series with a look at the problem: women have strong reactions to their husband's addiction and are then attacked for "shaming him."
I explained that part of the issue was that since the 1970's addiction has been framed as a disease. In the "disease" model the addict is seen as having "no
I've been contemplating for some time now writing a post on the "don't shame your husband" mantra traditionally heard in recovery circles. However, I'm glad I waited. It wasn't until I read that book I keep going on about, The Solution of Choice: Four Great Ideas that Neutralized Western Christianity that the rest of the pieces fell into place for
Grace... It's Not Tolerance
Those of you who have read Beyond Betrayal will know I’m a big believer in intimacy. Intimacy with God and others is, in my opinion the most important factor in healing from porn and sex addiction… and it’s a key component in healing from our betrayal trauma as well. An invitation to intimacy extended to our betrayer/husband
Lies We are Told about Sex Addiction: Part 2
This week we continue from last week's post with yet more lies circulating in parts of the therapeutic community that are unhelpful to porn/sex addicts and their spouses.
3. Your husband isn't a sex addict...or is he?
Many women have felt incredibly invalidated when they were told their husband wasn’t actually a sex addict. The conversation with
Lies We're Told About Sex Addiction
For the past several month I’ve been doing research (as part of my schooling) on sex addiction. At times the journey has been frustrating and painful at other times enlightening and helpful.
Over the next two weeks I’d like to address four bits of nonsense I’ve heard from sex addiction and sexual health "experts” about porn/sex
Church Experiences of Partners of Sex Addicts
by Donna Meredith Dixon
As part of the launch of Christian Sex Addiction Specialists International (C-SASI), long-time BB community member Donna Meredith Dixon wrote this blog post. Please share this with any church leader who could benefit.
Walking into the sanctuary, Susi’s pulse soared, and her throat constricted. Scanning the rows ahead, she quickly moved toward an empty one,
She's Not the Enemy: Part 2
Today we continue with Jeff Hutchinson's excellent article aimed at SA husbands that he started for us last week.
In the book Your Sexually Addicted Spouse, Barbra Stephens and Marsha Means provided the sex addiction community with a new model for understanding betrayal. Dr. Stephens proposed that the symptoms experienced by the partners of sex addicts are identical
She's Not the Enemy
by Jeff Hutchinson
“If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.”— Mark 3:25
My wife, Ella, and I have been facilitating couples' intensives since 2011. For addicts who are taking recovery seriously and partners who have somehow found it in their hearts to give him another chance, this can be a profound experience. A couple's intensive