Last week, I introduced the "Shame on... who?" series with a look at the problem: women have strong reactions to their husband's addiction and are then attacked for "shaming him."
I explained that part of the issue was that since the 1970's addiction has been framed as a disease. In the "disease" model the addict is seen as having "no
I've been contemplating for some time now writing a post on the "don't shame your husband" mantra traditionally heard in recovery circles. However, I'm glad I waited. It wasn't until I read that book I keep going on about, The Solution of Choice: Four Great Ideas that Neutralized Western Christianity that the rest of the pieces fell into place for
This week we continue from last week's post with yet more lies circulating in parts of the therapeutic community that are unhelpful to porn/sex addicts and their spouses.
3. Your husband isn't a sex addict...or is he?
Many women have felt incredibly invalidated when they were told their husband wasn’t actually a sex addict. The conversation with
For the past several month I’ve been doing research (as part of my schooling) on sex addiction. At times the journey has been frustrating and painful at other times enlightening and helpful.
Over the next two weeks I’d like to address four bits of nonsense I’ve heard from sex addiction and sexual health "experts” about porn/sex
Today we continue with Jeff Hutchinson's excellent article aimed at SA husbands that he started for us last week.
In the book Your Sexually Addicted Spouse, Barbra Stephens and Marsha Means provided the sex addiction community with a new model for understanding betrayal. Dr. Stephens proposed that the symptoms experienced by the partners of sex addicts are identical
Over the last few weeks I've been answering the question: what are the top 10 questions you've heard from wives/partners of porn and sex addicts and how would you answer these? Ted Shimer of Freedom Fight, has now created a handout with these questions and some succinct answers that will become a resource for his organization going forward. Today
This week we continue with more questions that those still in relationship with their sexually addicted husband often want answered soon after disclosure. Many thanks to Dr Barbara Steffens of APSATS who originally answered our last question today as part of our Ask the Experts series last year.
If my husband has a sex addiction, why is it he never
Recently, Ted Schimer of Freedom Fight asked me if I could share with him what I find to be the most frequently asked questions from wives of porn/sex addicts. Over the next couple of weeks I'll post the questions, and responses, I shared. These questions come from my personal experiences with wives on this journey, as well as from
Last week, I worked on deconstructing some of the mistaken thinking in Christian circles around the role marital sex plays in preventing sex addiction. This has been part of a larger series on bad advice aimed at wives of sex addicts and those looking to help them.
This week I finish off this series by tackling the myth that if